Tech & Me

Technology and I have a love-hate relationship. I'm pretty independent when it comes to most things. Maybe it comes with being the oldest sister of two brothers, the oldest English-speaker since way back in the family, along with many other influences that shaped me this way. Along with it comes the pride of not wanting to be dependent on anything or anyone. It is difficult for me to have to depend on something or someone because of my set habitual ways. I think my perspective on technology started out like that.

I remember when I got my first laptop at the start of my freshman year in college. The experience was similar to that of when I got my first smart phone. Emails, chats, messages, updates all day every day. I consider it the beginning of a new relationship that would last for a lifetime, whether I liked it or not. Even if I didn't want to accept it into my life, it had already penetrated into all systems that I was a part of. At times, there have been what I consider power struggles. Being in control was important to me, and all of it was controlling my every move; making me wait, telling me it can't do certain tasks, and telling me when it wasn't available. It was frustrating that I had to depend on certain things to live my life.
As such times have passed and over years and years of having it present in my life, I found there can be an equal give and take going on in this sort of situation. If I imagine being without technology, I definitely see the pros and without a doubt the cons. 


In my daily life, I use my phone as a connection to everything and everyone. I don't like to admit it but it's true. I know that when I don't have it with me, I feel like an orphan. I feel lost! When I don't have it with me, I get anxious. There is that 5% of me though, that feels kinda good not to be responsible almost, to be in touch? There's something about being totally disconnected that feels freeing. 


Coming back to my point, it is a love-hate relationship for sure! I know I don't need it, but when I don't have it I want it. When I have it, it's a burden knowing everything I want to know is at my fingertips. 




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